Simon Cowell, 'American Idol' judge, says neither Madonna nor Howard Stern could replace him

Simon Cowell, 'American Idol' judge, says neither Madonna nor Howard Stern could replace him


Isn’t this guy something or what? First of ALL, who the HELL IS SIMON COWEL, comparing himself to Howard S. and Madonna? A “British Nigel with bad teeth?” That’s right. Listen, Nigel Cowel with bad teeth. You’re a producer of an American ONE in a six dozen moronic TV shows that most of moronic, with impaired social skills Americans watch. These are the same crowd who brawl and broil on Jerry Springer Show; bowl and wail on Oprah; seeking cure and therapy on Dr.Phil; singers-wanna-be squealing like a crazed craw and bellowing like a donkey on American Idol.

Get a grip of yourself, you self-praised-donkey-asswipe.

Question: There is a one liner abou self praise, what is it??? its something like- self praising is equal to donkey's cry?

Answer: Simon Cowel

Was David Hasselhoff qualified to be a jury on American Idol? You bet. He was perfectly qualified for a show full of ass-cry-wanna-be-artist, musician. Who did you expect, Quincy Jones. This guy Bay Watched hundreds of great-asses that would overcast Hugh Haffner.

Two Words for Simon the Cow: Get real!

Crying Donkey

Submitted by Anonymous on Fri, 04/13/2007 - 12:38.

A guy walks into a Bar and looks at a sign on the wall that reads: $50 if you make my donkey laugh!



The guy thinks he can do it, so he goes out back to the donkey, to try his luck.



A few minutes later the bar owner goes and sees his donkey laughing his guts out.



The barman goes over to the man and says how did you do it.



The man replies. "I can't tell you it's a secret, just give me my $50 bucks.



The next day this same guy goes back the bar, and finds another sign that reads: $50 if you make my donkey cry



Again, the man thinks he can do it, so back he goes out to the donkey.



A short time later, the bar owner now finds his donkey balling it's eyes out.



"How did you do that" The bar keep demands.



The man says. "I really shouldn't tell you, but since your going to pay me another $50 dollars, what the heck".



"It was really very simple to make your donkey laugh, I told him that I had a bigger penis than he did".



"To make him cry, I proved it"!!!